Characteristics of Peacemakers
A Selection From So Long, Identity Crisis by Jay Knolls
Followers of Jesus have been entrusted with the responsibility of sharing the gospel of peace to the war-torn, broken, and wicked world. As peacemakers, we are also called to spread interpersonal peace by refusing to be combative while wisely seeking to resolve conflict in a biblical manner. Peacekeepers do not ignore problems or sugarcoat them; they apply kind and honest communication to conflict with the purpose of reaching a Christ-honoring solution. When conflict is correctly implemented with respect, grace, patience, and humility, problems are solved, relationships grow more intimate, marriages are rescued, confusion is clarified, mistakes are avoided, and sin is impeded. Becoming an effective peacemaker is well worth the investment of time and energy. To do so, we must develop the following six characteristics.
First, peacemakers honestly admit when there is a problem. The thirteenth chapter of Ezekiel is a troubling text. I would encourage you to read the entire chapter to get the full picture; I will only include a couple of key verses here. To set the context, the chapter addresses the issue of Israel’s prophets who were declaring prophecies that originated in their own imagination. God pronounces a woe oracle against these foolish prophets since they had seen nothing and were proclaiming false prophesies. They had seen false visions and lying divinations and yet announced they were from God. These prophets were liars and deceivers. Because they were speaking falsehoods, God stood against them.
In Ezekiel 13:10–12, God says, “Precisely because they have misled my people, saying, ‘Peace,’ when there is no peace, and because, when the people build a wall, these prophets smear it with whitewash, say to those who smear it with whitewash that it shall fall! There will be a deluge of rain, and you, O great hailstones, will fall, and a stormy wind break out. And when the wall falls, will it not be said to you, ‘Where is the coating with which you smeared it?’”
God’s imagery in this passage is profound. Whitewashing is using something to cover up or gloss over faults, mistakes, or wrongdoings. You can whitewash a wall, but if the cracks are not fixed, the wall will crumble. You can whitewash problems and conflicts, but eventually the relationship will fall to pieces. The plaster used by the foolish and lying prophets may provide a false expectation of peace and cover the cracks in the wall, but when the future storms come, everything will come crashing down.
In Jeremiah 6:14, we see a similar warning: peacemakers do not whitewash problems; they honestly admit them. Peacemakers are more concerned with pleasing God than with pleasing people. Resolute in their pursuit of purity, peacemakers seek to honor the Lord by addressing conflict according to Scripture. Obedience to God supersedes whitewashed peace and unresolved discord. Because peacemakers hunger and thirst for righteousness and seek purity of heart, they are committed to addressing problems, resolving conflict, and restoring relationships.
Second, peacemakers risk discomfort and rejection to constructively engage in necessary conflict. Perfectionists are a particular group who generally avoid conflict. They tend to live with the illusion that if they do everything perfectly, they will be free from conflict, criticism, correction, humiliation, and rejection. Try as they may, perfectionists are incapable of avoiding conflict because, well, no one is perfect.
People who fall into the “too nice for their own good” category erroneously believe that if they treat everyone with a layer of niceness thick as molasses, they will always receive the same in return. Excessively nice people are typically concerned with guarding their self-image; therefore, they focus more on leaving a likable impression than with making peace and growing closer to God and others through healthy conflict.
In the seventh Beatitude, Jesus is not promoting passively keeping the peace out of timidity for the sake of avoiding conflict. Mr. Too Nice leaves the conflict with his tail between his legs, and Mr. Take Charge leaves feeling vindicated and victorious. The underlying problem, however, is left unresolved and festering beneath the surface. Jesus forbids His disciples from glossing over conflict. Instead, we are to actively labor for peace.
The maker in peacemaker insinuates this is not a passive exercise but rather requires a purposeful investment of time and energy. Peacemakers desire something far greater than flimsy appeasement or the mere absence of conflict; they pursue restoration, wholeness, and well-being.
Timid people often avoid conflict out of alleged love for someone. In reality, the person who makes such claims only loves one person: themselves. From a heart of self-protection, peacekeepers avoid every hint of discord, conflict, and rejection. Out of self-interest, they whitewash problems instead of lovingly confronting them. Self-preservation keeps us from addressing conflict before it escalates. Before long, the problem grows and the discord intensifies; eventually, the cracks widen and the dam breaks. The tempting comfort of whitewashed peace must be sacrificed when truth and holiness are on the line.
Third, peacemakers never initiate unnecessary conflict and are not responsible for creating it. As we learned from Proverbs 3:30, the wise do not stir up strife, create discord, or seek out arguments or conflict. When peacemakers do knowingly or unknowingly create conflict, they accept responsibility for their actions and pursue peace. While some attempts at peace may not be reciprocated, peacemakers refrain from escalating the conflict through harsh responses or vengeful actions. Instead, they always follow Paul’s counsel in Romans 12:18, “If possible, so far as it depends on you, live peaceably with all.” In cases where discord and conflict continue for an extended period of time, faithful followers of Christ must commit to do whatever they can to restore peace.
Fourth, peacemakers actively and lovingly seek genuine resolution. Paradoxically, peacemakers are fighters; rather than waging war, however, peacemakers wage peace. Christians who long for righteousness and purity of heart willingly undergo discomfort and disorder for the purpose of peace. In order to mend relationships, peacemakers are kind instigators of conflict for the sake of peace and restoration. Refusing to tiptoe around issues, waiting for the other person to read their mind or initiate the restoration process, peacemakers humbly speak the truth in love and understand the spiritual benefits of a loving rebuke.
Pursuers of peace wholeheartedly believe Proverbs 27:5–6: “Better is open rebuke than hidden love. Faithful are the wounds of a friend; profuse are the kisses of an enemy.” Rebukes are never fun to give or receive, but they are necessary for spiritual growth and for establishing peace.
One of the major hindrances of peacemaking is people-pleasing. Overcome by the fear of people, people-pleasers are not effective peacemakers. Unwilling to endure the discomfort of interpersonal conflict, they eagerly tolerate whitewashed peace and the illusion of harmony. Effective peacemakers, however, brave the discomfort of conflict in hopes of reaching a peaceful resolution on the other side of the disagreement. People-pleasers are not effective peacemakers because they value personal comfort over truth and love, superficial peace over restorative conflict. They run from problems or pretend they do not exist; conflict is their archenemy.
Rather being truth-lovers and neighbor-lovers, people-pleasers are peace-lovers and self-lovers. As author Lou Priolo rightly observes, “A peace-lover is so afraid of conflict that he will avoid it at almost all costs. He is so concerned about ‘keeping the peace’ with his fellow man that he is often willing to forfeit the peace of God that comes from standing up and suffering for the truth. He is essentially a coward at heart.” [1] When tempted to be cowards, and unwilling to initiate constructive conflict, we must remember David’s words in Psalm 141:5. This verse was mentioned earlier, but here it is again: “Let a righteous man strike me—it is a kindness; let him rebuke me—it is oil for my head; let my head not refuse it.”
I will say it again: neither giving nor receiving a rebuke is pleasant, but given kindly, they are for our spiritual growth and for healing strained relationships. Peace-lovers are cowards; peacemakers are not. They love truth and their neighbors too much to cower from righteous conflict.
Fifth, peacemakers treat their enemies well. In Matthew 5:44, Jesus corrects the commonly held opinion of the day concerning enemies. The popular approach of despising one’s enemies was categorically denied by Jesus. Rather than hating their enemies, Christ’s disciples were commanded to love them. Through our acts of love, we serve as salt and light. Love is not merely an internal attitude; it produces outward actions like the ones Jesus illustrates in Matthew 5:39–44—turn the other cheek, sacrifice your cloak, go the extra mile, give generously to the one who begs from you, and pray for them.
I always like to point out that Jesus’s commandment to love our enemies assumes we will have people who abhor us. Enemies can be coworkers, next-door neighbors, acquaintances, or family members who stand against us; they want to see us fail. By God’s grace, I have a lot of people who love me and support my ministry. Unfortunately, I also have my share of people who dislike me. Unpopular decisions are part of leadership, and they always upset a few people. As followers of Jesus, we are not permitted to simply shrug our shoulders and treat our enemies with disdain. Even when we do all we can to restore a relationship, there are, regrettably, instances when that does not happen. In these circumstances, we are not free to hate those who refuse to biblically address the discord.
In cases where a peaceful solution is never achieved and restoration becomes impossible, peacemakers do not harbor bitterness, seek retaliation, or gossip about their enemy. Instead, they humbly forgive and mercifully love their enemies. Liking and loving people who treat us well is easy—even unbelievers do that well. Those who draw their identity from Jesus, however, do what does not come naturally: they love their enemies.
Peacemakers always treat their enemies with grace and kindness, and do good to all, even to individuals who hate them (see Luke 6:27–28). Following Christ means we obey Paul’s reminder to leave vengeance to the Lord, and if our enemies are facing hunger, we feed them. When people are thirsty, we provide them with drink. Rather than responding to evil with evil, we overcome evil with mercy, grace, and goodness (see Romans 12:19–21).
Peacemakers retain civility when defending God’s truth and holy name. Even when difficult conversations must take place, peacemakers do not share truth devoid of love, grace, and mercy. Too many Christians are harsh, condescending, and Pharisaical when speaking truth. When we speak truth without love, it is like performing surgery without anesthesia. Peacemakers are perpetually kind to everyone, even to the worst, because they understand that God can use their peaceable attitude and civility to draw even their enemies to Christ.
Sixth, peacemakers are fortunate recipients of God’s blessing. God’s enmity rests on those who sow discord and perpetually disturb the peace. Sowing discord is listed in Proverbs 6:16–19 as one of seven things the Lord hates and considers an abomination. If peacemaking gives indication of new life in Christ, peace-breaking gives indication of a carnal heart. The devil was the first peace-breaker, and those who fall prey to his diabolical schemes will behave like him. Peacemakers emulate their heavenly Father; disrupters of peace, however, mimic their father the devil. As Stott writes, “It is the devil who is a troublemaker; it is God who loves reconciliation and who now through his children, as formerly through his only begotten Son, is bent on making peace.” [2]
Purity of heart motivates us to pursue peace. But if our hearts are consumed with sin and idolatry, we are likely to more closely resemble the devil than our heavenly Father. As the master of misdirection, Satan lures us into wasting a lot of our time and energy on frivolous arguments and debates. Every second wasted on pointless disagreements is a second that will never be invested into building godly relationships.
[1] Lou Priolo, Pleasing People (Phillipsburg, NJ: P&R Publishing, 2007), 25.
[2] John R. W. Stott, The Message of the Sermon on the Mount (Downers Grove, IL: InterVarsity Press, 2020), 34.
Followers of Jesus have been entrusted with the responsibility of sharing the gospel of peace to the war-torn, broken, and wicked world. As peacemakers, we are also called to spread interpersonal peace by refusing to be combative while wisely seeking to resolve conflict in a biblical manner. Peacekeepers do not ignore problems or sugarcoat them; they apply kind and honest communication to conflict with the purpose of reaching a Christ-honoring solution. When conflict is correctly implemented with respect, grace, patience, and humility, problems are solved, relationships grow more intimate, marriages are rescued, confusion is clarified, mistakes are avoided, and sin is impeded. Becoming an effective peacemaker is well worth the investment of time and energy. To do so, we must develop the following six characteristics.
First, peacemakers honestly admit when there is a problem. The thirteenth chapter of Ezekiel is a troubling text. I would encourage you to read the entire chapter to get the full picture; I will only include a couple of key verses here. To set the context, the chapter addresses the issue of Israel’s prophets who were declaring prophecies that originated in their own imagination. God pronounces a woe oracle against these foolish prophets since they had seen nothing and were proclaiming false prophesies. They had seen false visions and lying divinations and yet announced they were from God. These prophets were liars and deceivers. Because they were speaking falsehoods, God stood against them.
In Ezekiel 13:10–12, God says, “Precisely because they have misled my people, saying, ‘Peace,’ when there is no peace, and because, when the people build a wall, these prophets smear it with whitewash, say to those who smear it with whitewash that it shall fall! There will be a deluge of rain, and you, O great hailstones, will fall, and a stormy wind break out. And when the wall falls, will it not be said to you, ‘Where is the coating with which you smeared it?’”
God’s imagery in this passage is profound. Whitewashing is using something to cover up or gloss over faults, mistakes, or wrongdoings. You can whitewash a wall, but if the cracks are not fixed, the wall will crumble. You can whitewash problems and conflicts, but eventually the relationship will fall to pieces. The plaster used by the foolish and lying prophets may provide a false expectation of peace and cover the cracks in the wall, but when the future storms come, everything will come crashing down.
In Jeremiah 6:14, we see a similar warning: peacemakers do not whitewash problems; they honestly admit them. Peacemakers are more concerned with pleasing God than with pleasing people. Resolute in their pursuit of purity, peacemakers seek to honor the Lord by addressing conflict according to Scripture. Obedience to God supersedes whitewashed peace and unresolved discord. Because peacemakers hunger and thirst for righteousness and seek purity of heart, they are committed to addressing problems, resolving conflict, and restoring relationships.
Second, peacemakers risk discomfort and rejection to constructively engage in necessary conflict. Perfectionists are a particular group who generally avoid conflict. They tend to live with the illusion that if they do everything perfectly, they will be free from conflict, criticism, correction, humiliation, and rejection. Try as they may, perfectionists are incapable of avoiding conflict because, well, no one is perfect.
People who fall into the “too nice for their own good” category erroneously believe that if they treat everyone with a layer of niceness thick as molasses, they will always receive the same in return. Excessively nice people are typically concerned with guarding their self-image; therefore, they focus more on leaving a likable impression than with making peace and growing closer to God and others through healthy conflict.
In the seventh Beatitude, Jesus is not promoting passively keeping the peace out of timidity for the sake of avoiding conflict. Mr. Too Nice leaves the conflict with his tail between his legs, and Mr. Take Charge leaves feeling vindicated and victorious. The underlying problem, however, is left unresolved and festering beneath the surface. Jesus forbids His disciples from glossing over conflict. Instead, we are to actively labor for peace.
The maker in peacemaker insinuates this is not a passive exercise but rather requires a purposeful investment of time and energy. Peacemakers desire something far greater than flimsy appeasement or the mere absence of conflict; they pursue restoration, wholeness, and well-being.
Timid people often avoid conflict out of alleged love for someone. In reality, the person who makes such claims only loves one person: themselves. From a heart of self-protection, peacekeepers avoid every hint of discord, conflict, and rejection. Out of self-interest, they whitewash problems instead of lovingly confronting them. Self-preservation keeps us from addressing conflict before it escalates. Before long, the problem grows and the discord intensifies; eventually, the cracks widen and the dam breaks. The tempting comfort of whitewashed peace must be sacrificed when truth and holiness are on the line.
Third, peacemakers never initiate unnecessary conflict and are not responsible for creating it. As we learned from Proverbs 3:30, the wise do not stir up strife, create discord, or seek out arguments or conflict. When peacemakers do knowingly or unknowingly create conflict, they accept responsibility for their actions and pursue peace. While some attempts at peace may not be reciprocated, peacemakers refrain from escalating the conflict through harsh responses or vengeful actions. Instead, they always follow Paul’s counsel in Romans 12:18, “If possible, so far as it depends on you, live peaceably with all.” In cases where discord and conflict continue for an extended period of time, faithful followers of Christ must commit to do whatever they can to restore peace.
Fourth, peacemakers actively and lovingly seek genuine resolution. Paradoxically, peacemakers are fighters; rather than waging war, however, peacemakers wage peace. Christians who long for righteousness and purity of heart willingly undergo discomfort and disorder for the purpose of peace. In order to mend relationships, peacemakers are kind instigators of conflict for the sake of peace and restoration. Refusing to tiptoe around issues, waiting for the other person to read their mind or initiate the restoration process, peacemakers humbly speak the truth in love and understand the spiritual benefits of a loving rebuke.
Pursuers of peace wholeheartedly believe Proverbs 27:5–6: “Better is open rebuke than hidden love. Faithful are the wounds of a friend; profuse are the kisses of an enemy.” Rebukes are never fun to give or receive, but they are necessary for spiritual growth and for establishing peace.
One of the major hindrances of peacemaking is people-pleasing. Overcome by the fear of people, people-pleasers are not effective peacemakers. Unwilling to endure the discomfort of interpersonal conflict, they eagerly tolerate whitewashed peace and the illusion of harmony. Effective peacemakers, however, brave the discomfort of conflict in hopes of reaching a peaceful resolution on the other side of the disagreement. People-pleasers are not effective peacemakers because they value personal comfort over truth and love, superficial peace over restorative conflict. They run from problems or pretend they do not exist; conflict is their archenemy.
Rather being truth-lovers and neighbor-lovers, people-pleasers are peace-lovers and self-lovers. As author Lou Priolo rightly observes, “A peace-lover is so afraid of conflict that he will avoid it at almost all costs. He is so concerned about ‘keeping the peace’ with his fellow man that he is often willing to forfeit the peace of God that comes from standing up and suffering for the truth. He is essentially a coward at heart.” [1] When tempted to be cowards, and unwilling to initiate constructive conflict, we must remember David’s words in Psalm 141:5. This verse was mentioned earlier, but here it is again: “Let a righteous man strike me—it is a kindness; let him rebuke me—it is oil for my head; let my head not refuse it.”
I will say it again: neither giving nor receiving a rebuke is pleasant, but given kindly, they are for our spiritual growth and for healing strained relationships. Peace-lovers are cowards; peacemakers are not. They love truth and their neighbors too much to cower from righteous conflict.
Fifth, peacemakers treat their enemies well. In Matthew 5:44, Jesus corrects the commonly held opinion of the day concerning enemies. The popular approach of despising one’s enemies was categorically denied by Jesus. Rather than hating their enemies, Christ’s disciples were commanded to love them. Through our acts of love, we serve as salt and light. Love is not merely an internal attitude; it produces outward actions like the ones Jesus illustrates in Matthew 5:39–44—turn the other cheek, sacrifice your cloak, go the extra mile, give generously to the one who begs from you, and pray for them.
I always like to point out that Jesus’s commandment to love our enemies assumes we will have people who abhor us. Enemies can be coworkers, next-door neighbors, acquaintances, or family members who stand against us; they want to see us fail. By God’s grace, I have a lot of people who love me and support my ministry. Unfortunately, I also have my share of people who dislike me. Unpopular decisions are part of leadership, and they always upset a few people. As followers of Jesus, we are not permitted to simply shrug our shoulders and treat our enemies with disdain. Even when we do all we can to restore a relationship, there are, regrettably, instances when that does not happen. In these circumstances, we are not free to hate those who refuse to biblically address the discord.
In cases where a peaceful solution is never achieved and restoration becomes impossible, peacemakers do not harbor bitterness, seek retaliation, or gossip about their enemy. Instead, they humbly forgive and mercifully love their enemies. Liking and loving people who treat us well is easy—even unbelievers do that well. Those who draw their identity from Jesus, however, do what does not come naturally: they love their enemies.
Peacemakers always treat their enemies with grace and kindness, and do good to all, even to individuals who hate them (see Luke 6:27–28). Following Christ means we obey Paul’s reminder to leave vengeance to the Lord, and if our enemies are facing hunger, we feed them. When people are thirsty, we provide them with drink. Rather than responding to evil with evil, we overcome evil with mercy, grace, and goodness (see Romans 12:19–21).
Peacemakers retain civility when defending God’s truth and holy name. Even when difficult conversations must take place, peacemakers do not share truth devoid of love, grace, and mercy. Too many Christians are harsh, condescending, and Pharisaical when speaking truth. When we speak truth without love, it is like performing surgery without anesthesia. Peacemakers are perpetually kind to everyone, even to the worst, because they understand that God can use their peaceable attitude and civility to draw even their enemies to Christ.
Sixth, peacemakers are fortunate recipients of God’s blessing. God’s enmity rests on those who sow discord and perpetually disturb the peace. Sowing discord is listed in Proverbs 6:16–19 as one of seven things the Lord hates and considers an abomination. If peacemaking gives indication of new life in Christ, peace-breaking gives indication of a carnal heart. The devil was the first peace-breaker, and those who fall prey to his diabolical schemes will behave like him. Peacemakers emulate their heavenly Father; disrupters of peace, however, mimic their father the devil. As Stott writes, “It is the devil who is a troublemaker; it is God who loves reconciliation and who now through his children, as formerly through his only begotten Son, is bent on making peace.” [2]
Purity of heart motivates us to pursue peace. But if our hearts are consumed with sin and idolatry, we are likely to more closely resemble the devil than our heavenly Father. As the master of misdirection, Satan lures us into wasting a lot of our time and energy on frivolous arguments and debates. Every second wasted on pointless disagreements is a second that will never be invested into building godly relationships.
[1] Lou Priolo, Pleasing People (Phillipsburg, NJ: P&R Publishing, 2007), 25.
[2] John R. W. Stott, The Message of the Sermon on the Mount (Downers Grove, IL: InterVarsity Press, 2020), 34.
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